Sunday, December 20, 2009

and, in a whisper, he was gone

I lost someone today. We were not close on a day to day basis...but we were cousins...we were family. And he was young. With a wife and with daughters. And with much life ahead of him. And he is gone...and it is hard to know what to do with that...


coda...his dog

He is the first person I have lost where I can not make some kind of sense of it...he was not elderly, a person who had lived their life...he should not have had his time cut short. And, at this point, I struggle to wrap my mind around it...



He is the first person to make me really feel the difference between losing pets and losing people, because as much as have I felt and do acknowlege the pain of losing pets, this is a different grief. I miss knowing that he is on this earth and I know that what I feel is only a fragment of what his wife and children and parents must be feeling...because he left far too soon. And as long as I am in this world, I will never understand why the universe felt that he had to go.



his daughter and coda

So here's to vintage sportscars and 21 year-old scotch and to our dogs (coda) and fresh sushi and to family and to the simple joys that can be found in this world...here's to some of the things that I know he loved. And here's to the next adventure....you will be missed and you will always be loved, Gord.

29 comments:

centenniel said...

I'm very sorry for the loss of your friend. May he rest in peace. And may you, his family, his dog and his friends find comfort in each other.
♥ Lynne

HBFG said...

This is sad, sorry to read about the loss. It is always difficult to "understand" the "plan" universe has for each of us. I even think it is not a question of understanding. It is a question of weather we are able to accept or not and if we are able to find peace with it.
Is there some sense to it? No.
Is there something to understand? No.
Is there something fair or unfair to it? No.
It is as it is and the only thing that is left to do for those who are "left behind" is to realize how precious every moment is and how important it is to live now. Because the tomorrow doesn't exist.
CODA is a very special dog! Great pictures!
I wish you all strength!

Hilary said...

Andrea, I'm so sorry for your loss.

Becky said...

I'm sorry for your loss. It is very hard to grasp why. I lost one of my best friends in August and am still grappling with the why. Coda is a great dog and will help with the family's pain. He is that kind of dog.

Barry said...

I know something of that senselessness of loss and the turmoil it leaves in its wake.

The season of the year must make it particularly poignant.

My thoughts are certainly with you.

Bruce said...

What a very nice tribute...we are touched.
Bruce the cat & Sharon:)

Holly said...

*sucks in breath sharply*


I am sorry. What a lovely way to remember your friend and his family. I will hold them in my thoughts.

Emma Rose said...

We are so sorry for your loss. We will keep your family in our prayers.

Emma Rose and The Duchess

L. D. Burgus said...

It is so hard, and the pain is so personal. As children we are never really are prepared to understand how fragile life can be. As we appreciate our own lives, we understand the memories are warming for us, but are our source of sorrow too. I am sorry.

Shirley said...

So sorry about the loss of your cousin, it is always hard when this happens around Christmas time. God has His own plans for each of us, and we never know the number of our days, so I try to live each day as if it were to be my last, and to give and receive love in everything I do. God bless those who are mourning his loss.

Erin P said...

I'm sorry for your loss. I don't know if there is any sense to it to find, but maybe after lots of time, there will be acceptance.

The OP Pack said...

So very sorry to hear of your loss. Mom lost her brother when he was only 27 and he died the day after a cancer diagnosis - a day she will never forget. Hugs to you at this sad time.

Woos, Phantom and Thunder

Raising Addie said...

We are very sorry for your loss.

We will keep you guys in our thoughts and prayers.

Lots of Luv & Kisses
Addie, Lucie and Hailey

The Write Girl said...

What a heartfelt good bye Andrea...God bless his family.

Maggie May said...

I'm so sorry for the loss of your cousin. It's heartbreaking to look at a the photo of his daughter and think what they are going through as well. Wishing you peace and comfort,

Maggie

Country Girl said...

I am so sorry for your loss, for his parents loss, his daughter's loss, his dog's loss. My condolences are all I can offer.

Shana said...

Sorry for your loss.

Samantha ~ Holly and Zac ~ said...

I am very sorry for your loss.
*hugs* to you and your family.

Muddy Boot Dreams said...

Andrea, I am so sorry for your loss. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

Jen

Carolynn said...

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, Andrea. And, yet in the midst of sadness, there is comfort in the form of a fur clad angel and many arms to hold and hug and share the burden of grief. My heart goes out to you and his family.

T said...

Just wanted to stop by and wish you a very Merry Christmas! Hope to be catching up on blogging and commenting in the next few weeks.

Far Side of Fifty said...

Andrea, I read what you wrote back in August..this dog will be a source of comfort to the remaining family members. I am truly sorry..sometimes death makes no sense..you are pretty normal to struggle with the reason why? But why not.. some peoples journeys are way to short..and some are way to long..I am always saddened by a young productive persons death..it seems so senseless..but we have to remember that God is in charge..and what we perceive as not right..is perfect..because God does not make mistakes. Hang in there..prayers to you and your family for comfort are winging their way from Minnesota..and wishes for a Merry Christmas too..give Sophie a good ear scratching from me:)

Tatersmama said...

Oh Andrea... I'm so sorry for the loss of your cousin. I know firsthand how hard it can be to make sense of a young life cut short, but I've always taken comfort in the fact that God knows what he's doing - even if we don't understand why ourselves. If we have 'faith', then we have to have faith in his knowledge.

Wishing you and yours a Peaceful Christmas...
Give Sophie a squeeze for me..
xoxoxox

gigi said...

So sorry to hear of your great loss. It is never easy to lose anyone especially family.
May you and your famly be blessed wth peace this Christmas season.
Many Blesssngs.

Scout 'n Freyja said...

I will never understand who goes and who stays and who has pain and who has all the money. Nothing on earth makes sense to me but at the same time it can be one of the most beautiful places to spend time. My arms are wrapped around your soul during this immense time of mourning for you.

Jeanne said...

I'm so sorry. It's harder when it's sudden, and when we feel the person lost still had work to do on this planet....

Merry Christmas, dear.

Small Footprints said...

Oh ... I'm so sorry for your loss. It doesn't seem right or fair. I hope that the joy of having him in your life for as long as you did ... and the beautiful memories of your time together, will be comforting and help you through this difficult time. He will live on through all of you!

My thoughts are with you!

Small Footprints

Karen ~ Cider Antiques said...

So sorry for your loss. May loving memories help to ease your pain. Karen

Oz Girl said...

Andrea, I am so very sorry for your loss...even though it is a month later, I know his family is still struggling with his empty place at the dinner table. I truly believe that pets help ease our suffering, and I hope Coda is doing his job well.

Give Sophie a very belated New Year's scritch from all of us... hoping you have a wonderful 2010!

*hugs*
Susan